By: Anoosha Avni, Ph.D.
Registered Clinical Counsellor
Do you find yourself exhausted most of the time, yet feel that you’re not doing enough?
Do you resolve to do things differently every year, but then fall back into the same habits?
Do people tell you that you take on too much or that you need to slow down?
Stop and ask yourself why you’re doing so much. Is it because you want to do it all? Or do you feel obligated to do it all? If you truly enjoy doing it all – getting the perfect gift for your family and friends, making the perfect turkey dinner from scratch, making decorations – and truly feel satisfied, then keep doing it.
If you find yourself feeling more tired and resentful at the myriad of things you have committed yourself to doing, then stop and ask yourself the following questions: Who is telling you to “do it all”? Do you feel like a failure as a woman, a wife, a daughter, a sister, or a mother if everything isn’t perfect this holiday season? Will your in-laws quietly, but poignantly “tsk-tsk” you if everything isn’t just so?
If you truly enjoy doing everything for everybody and don’t feel an ounce of resentment for being pulled in many different directions by many different people and still enjoy making a ten course meal, then read no further.
If, on the other hand, you find yourself doing things for others hoping to impress them, one-up them, seek their love or approval, or otherwise distract yourself from pain and hurt in other areas of your life, then it’s time to seriously re-evaluate why you are catering to the needs to others while neglecting your own health and well-being.
You’re not doing anybody any good by being unkind to yourself. If anything, you’re showing others how to treat you. And you’re probably not setting a very good example, right?
When you don’t treat yourself kindly, then why should others?
No comments:
Post a Comment